I’m going to start this week’s column being completely honest. I’ll try most things twice for the sake of curiosity and pleasure, but me and riding do not get along. Maybe, I don’t have Megan Thee Stallion knees.
Or maybe, I’m overly concerned about how my body looks on top. Are my titties, tittying? Does my stomach look flat? Are my knees making the “Grindin’” beat? Somewhere between being self-conscious (it’s normal!) and being caught in the continuous battle of “ride with your feet” vs. “ride with your knees,” I decided that being on top just wasn’t for me.
Every once in a while, I think about if I every gave riding a real chance and was too quick to write off as “not my thing.” So, for this week’s column—that came recommended via my DMs— we’re talking dick riding 101 with yoga instructor and adult content creator Brielle Jenkins.
Buckle in, because it’s time to ride!
Brielle (she/her) is a Florida native and Brooklyn based artist, yoga instructor, and adult content creator. Bath Time with Brielle covers topics involving sex, relationships and self-care. “I’m passionate about sharing advice on how to further your sexual exploration with yourself, a partner or multiple partners! You can support Brielle on Only Fans, YouTube, or via Cash App + Venmo: Femlord
Tip #1- Work Out:
As you may already know, being on top can be a very physically exhausting position. Building confidence with this sex position can start with a new workout routine.
Here are a few workouts that will build muscle where you need it:
SQUATS —lots of squats—deep lunges, mountain climbers , pulsing your hips in bridge pose, supine leg lifts.
It’s essential to work on your flexibility in the hips! The last thing you want is to do is injure your hip while you’re riding. A few yoga poses you can do include: Frog pose, pigeon pose, happy baby, warrior 2.
Being on top isn’t an easy physical task! You can really hurt yourself if you push too hard! Be easy on yourself and don’t expect crazy endurance on the first try.
Tip #2 – Build Your Confidence!
If you’re hesitant to get on top because you’re insecure of the way you may look, you’re not alone. It can take practice to work your way up to it. Newsflash—your personal hang ups about your body matter more to you than the person you’re sleeping with.
Try setting up a comfortable environment with mood lighting. I recommend this remote operated light bulb.
Another way to set the mood is by using candles. Nothing makes me feel sexier than the flickering light of a flame. Just make sure the candles aren’t too close to where you’re having sex, that’s not the kind of heat we’re trying to build.
Once you have your environment all set, you can consider keeping on your bra, sexy lingerie, or even a t-shirt to make you feel more comfortable! Hiding your sensitive areas (even if your partner loves them) can offer a sense of safety and allow you to move past your insecurities and focus on riding.
Tip #3 – Channel Your Inner Ciara:
Ten years ago, I saw a video that changed my life forever — Ciara’s ‘Ride’ ft. Ludacris. We can’t expect to reach Ciara’s level of perfection overnight, but we can damn sure try.
I prefer to start with my knees on either side of my partners hips, spread out wide. Before any penetration takes place, take some time to connect with your partner. Look them in the eyes, make out, maybe grind your body on theirs. Remember, you can always return to chest to chest whenever you get tired. Technically, this still counts as being on top! After some fun foreplay, motion for your partner to insert their penis, strap on or put it in yourself!
Start slow. Place your partner’s hands on your hips as you move yours back and forth. Put your arms behind you, placing them on the bed, your partner’s thighs or shins and continue to move back and forth. Spice it u[ by whispering “You like it like that?” Move your hips in a circle, side to side, in a figure 8, and remember your hips do NOT lie.
Ready to speed it up? Have your partner pulse from underneath you while they are pushing down on your hips — prop your ass up a bit so they have room to move up and down. You’ll still look hot while they are doing all of the work! Don’t forget to grab your titties, stick some fingers in your mouth, and have fun! If you’d like to bounce up and down, PLEASE be careful. It sounds hot, but it can ruin the mood when your partner is worried about their dick snapping in half.
Get in Rhythm! Finding the rhythm with your partner while being on top can be a little tough. I recommend one person is moving their hips at a time. If you’re both thrusting together, it can be hard to find a groove. If you two get a little off beat, just giggle and reset. Nothing about this has to be perfect. The goal is for you and your partner to enjoy yourselves!
Pro tip: Have your partner hold your vibrator to your clit while you’re grinding for an explosive orgasm!
Tip #4 – Communicate!
If you’re hesitant about initiating getting on top, feel free to talk to your partner beforehand! Let them know that it’s something you’d like to try. You can even watch some porn with your partner featuring a couple doing the same thing. This will let them know what’s on your mind.